For Every Problem, a Solution

Part 1 of a series where every problem's solution is the same.

Writ in bold, on three separate lines: Little Black Dress

Those words open an American Apparel add with a picture of an attractive, young lady in (you guessed it) a black dress, posed with her right arm dangling down to her parted thighs, and her shadowed left hand partially sticking out from behind her matching hair (styled in what is almost a flopper's short page-boy).  Her breasts are mashed to her body behind a sheer lining (also black), allowing her to have a medium neckline and a low cut front at the same time.  Her expression is inscrutable, and not far from blank.

What's interesting in this add is the very small text beneath the gigantic declaration, "Little Black Dress":

"Meet Lea.
"She's a French tomboy and actress hailing from a family full of boys.  She's a French tomboy, tennis player and actress from a family of all boys."

If it had stopped there, or continued on in that pattern, I would have been impressed.  She's a French tomboy, short order cook, tennis player, and actress from a family with many boys.  She's a French tomboy, go-cart driver, short order cook, tennis player, and actress from a family brimming with boys. She's a French tomboy, middling poet...  Think of the possibilities.  Alas, it ends thus:

"Lea lives and models in Los Angeles, but will be enrolling in college this coming fall in one of our favorite places, Montreal.  She is wearing the Cotton Spandex Sleeveless Gloria-V Dress."  And follows with a list of retail locations.

It was but a step from genius.

The purpose driven life.

In the purpose driven life, original intent rules: whatever something was made for is its purpose, and any other use is a perversion.  Accordingly, those who deride and condemn homosexuals for breaking this primary rule--one which itself seems more to follow from fiat than design--also refuse to drink milk, because it is intended for infant cattle; to eat peaches, because those are meant to nourish new peach trees; to partake of honey, which is supposed to feed bees; to use paperweights which were ever anything else; to flip coins; to vomit; to accept medically administered suppositories; to make origami with anything but origami paper; to make paper airplanes at all; or even to use paper, which is just repurposed pulp that should be either doing its work in a plant somewhere or else rotting into new life.  These people are never specious hypocrites, because that would clearly go against God's plan for them.

Does whatever a spider can.

Getting good at drawing Spider-Man seems like it would be both fun and headache inducing--appropriate to the character.  It's harder to draw him than you might think.  Spidey is a funky dude.  He moves like a nerd with superpowers where his lower ribs should be, only with panache.  That's hard to capture.

Then there's the web design on his suit.  I like drawing patterns, but it's difficult to get this one to conform to the body, and harder still to not let it distract from more important lines (his head's contours, for example).  Using nib pens and brushes would help, I'm sure.  Multiliners probably weren't the best choice in this situation, but they felt more comfortable otherwise, so I went with them.

Despite having read hundreds of Spidey comics over the years, I never did any firm sketches of the guy until I set out to make this drawing as a Christmas present for coworkers' children.  I think the lack of experience shows, but kids hardly notice that stuff.  They just like Spiderman.  That's cool with me.

Kids also like cityscapes drawn in three distinct styles.

bizzarre kindle sketches

Something along the lines of what I might draw in the margins of someone else's papers or on a receipt at work. The big difference here is this was done with my thumbs. Not the most nimble digits, they. I also made an attempt not to go with my now standard starting point of the eye. Doing the same thing all the time gets comfortable, and may be good practice to start, but is ill conducive to creativity. If sketches like these are to be anything but mindless ticks recorded on paper, the sketcher has to at be willing to be weird and forget his usual tacks. Sometimes, I am successful in these minor endeavors. It's a little harder using just my thumbs, though. Have been considering getting a stylus to remove such excuses, but first, I'll need money.