Pointless Man

CHARACTER NOTES [to be supplemented with illustrations] Outlaw -- scofflaw type Mass Murder Guy - Drifted in from who knows where? Disowned by his own cousin; drinks buttermilk; never had a dog; thinks only of himself. The Beatdown Squad -- detectives Slim - Won top honors at the donut academy; voted most valuable and most likely by his classmates; rarely speaks, but likes to hang out. Beditchki - Tough, resilient; the kind of guy you want on your dodgeball team; former bouncer and high school dance chaparone; impulsive. Best friend: Turk. Turk - AKA Red, AKA The Greek. Second Degree Black Belt in Pud Sze Mu. Last book read: The Hobbit. Favorite Singer: Cher, in her Sonny and Cher days. Drinks Absolut Vodka. Best friend: Beditchki. Truefaux - A Frenchman, but do not cross him. Plays charades and backgammon. Immaculate dresser. Has a bald spot no one mentions. Bill - An ordingary guy who likes to hurt people when he fights. Has three cats. Home town: Grover's Corners...

Having been conceived over ten years ago, it has long puzzled me that no other accounts of these events have been published. Yes, it was more than a decade ago when I first set out with my friend, JB, to write the story of the Beatdown Squad and its fateful encounters with that infamous Mass Murder Guy. We got so far as a rough script detailing the Squad's misadventures in a nameless prison--a tale which housed the origin of the Squad's interest in Mass Murder. After accomplishing an outline of what would follow, the project foundered. However, my involvement did not end there, nor did I cease involving others. I cannot say how many people I have regaled with the Squad's exploits, but surely it was enough for someone else to take up this task. The Beatdown Squad and Mass Murder Guy will not leave me alone. They insist their story be told. I cannot express how bitter their persistence has made me. Their demands can be resisted no longer. Well, fine then. In some measure of v...