Pointless Man

West Seattle comprises many streets, most of them winding. Among these are 'Simon' and 'Belmont'. The Internet admits to no such intersection, but in my mind, the corner of Simon and Belmont is sandwiched between The Point and Yellow Submarine . Its people eat hearts and hunt monsters. Its houses constantly play chip-tunes, and will serve you roast ham if you whip them in the right spots. Even shiny vampires avoid that place.

A classic game, but not really what I was expecting from the title, to be honest. This remains a mild disappointment, all these years later.

It is a wonder someone hasn't made Bad Dudes into a flick. I mean, really, can you get a better action premise than street thugs trying to save the President from the ninjas who kidnapped him? I don't think so.