"You're all alone, you know."

Citizens, hear me out. This could happen to you:

Trying to come up with a title for this post, I was looking up the lyrics for the Kingston Trio's rendition of 'Zombie Jamboree' (from which this post's title was culled). The first link Google came up with said it had what I needed, so I clicked on it, and started reading. Sure enough, the page itself said it offered the lyrics for the relevant song, as follows.

"Cause he gets up in the morning, / And he goes to work at nine, / And he comes back home at five-thirty, / Gets the same train every time. / 'Cause his world is built 'round punctuality, / It never fails."

As I read, I had the growing fear that someone had confused
a Kinks song about a young bourgeois Brit for an American ditty about a zombie dance-party. By the end of the stanza, I was convinced. I understand the Davies brothers can seem be creepy, but really.

Ah, the Internet age, an era with misinformation ever at your fingertips. To make another Kingston Trio reference (itself a quote), these are the times that try men's souls.

Anyway, I clicked the next link Google listed, and found what I was looking for. Plus, I was able to relate this totally true story to you, so I guess it's not all bad.